June 7, 2025

There Will Come A Day


I started volunteering at a local animal shelter last week, and while driving home the other day after walking a dozen or so dogs, I was of course feeling emotional thinking about Joey, and I don't know where the thought came from or why it came or who exactly was speaking it to me (or if it was just one of the many voices in my head randomly interjecting something, as they so often do), but out of nowhere while waiting at a stoplight the voice/idea/message came to me and said something to the effect of, "You know, there will come a day—probably not tomorrow, but maybe a month from now or maybe a year from now—when you will think about Joey with nothing but gratitude and joy. Your memories won't be overshadowed or tainted by shock and heartbreak and misery and loneliness, but will instead just be happiness. You'll see the totality of your life together as only peace, as only what it always ever was: Love." This was the first time in nearly 8 weeks that I even realized this kind of thinking and perspective was possible. I also realized that this will probably happen in pieces here and there and I probably won't even realize it until days or weeks or months later. One of those pieces came that day at the stoplight, even as I was crying like a blubbering idiot while listening to "Joey" and thinking about the best friend I've ever had. Thank god my windows are tinted, thank god for our memories.

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